Fragmented Brain Matter » musings

Greed

bhowmik — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 13:50:30 +0000

“Money doesn’t change men, It merely unmasks them. If a Man is naturally selfish or greedy, the Money brings that out, that’s all.” – Henry Ford

These days I’ve been experiencing life as opposed to just living it. To be honest a lot of it is unpleasant. Actually, that’s not true, It’s not life that’s unpleasant its some of the people that i bump into that make it seem like that. Life by itself is very beautiful.

This is a personal rant and might be boring and will be very very very non-specific because i know that the person towards whom this post is directed is never going to read it. The person assumes that they are beyond such things and have better things to do in life.

I really don’t have any objections to how somebody wants to live their life. Though I’d love to not be judgemental, But I’d be lying if i said that I am not.

There’s this person, “person” because i will definitely puke if i associate the word friend with that entity, who I’ve known for a while. I’ve had the opportunity of knowing this person and through this association i have also known how their life has panned out in the last few years. I have also seen the transformation and Today was a revelation to the extent of that transformation. The transformation hasn’t just been in terms of greed but in overall demeanor. From a normal person to somebody who is arrogant and stuck up, somebody totally full of themselves and so money minded that i can see “$” in their eyes even without trying.
I don’t have a problem with a miser, a miser looks to save his own money by scrounging on something and denying himself that thing.

But i positively despise a leech. A leech is a parasite who feeds off others. Yes, thats a brilliant way to describe this person. A Slimy Leech.

To be honest it would be an insult for the leech to relate this person to a leech. I can safely say that i haven’t seen such a specimen ever before in my life and i hope to god that i don’t ever come across one again.

The only sad thing is that till now i used to live my life thinking that people are inherently honest, truthful and have integrity and morals. This one person will change that outlook for a while to come and will make me wary in general. I’ve tried to convince myself that it really isn’t necessary to generalise because of one person. But that will probably take a while to sink in.

To end with, the Mahatma again got it right,

“There is enough in the world for every man’s need, but not every man’s greed.”

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⊙

bhowmik — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 09:07:02 +0000

Where do you turn to for Inspiration? … Inside You? … Outside?

What if, at times … it just doesn’t seem to be worth the search?

What if in the echoing silence all around there are screams of chaos? What when, the silence is more deafening than the screams?

We fall, stumble, get up and dust ourselves and march on with heads held high … for how long? Sometimes the march itself is aimless. What happens when you are moving in circles?

What happens when axioms remain just that … axioms, but are eventually no closer to the truth than truth itself. What happens when the hollowness is all ensuing and omnipresent.

What happens when reflections are empty and all you see is the void. What if the presence of the void is scarier than the void itself?

What happens when things that matter run through their shelf life?

What happens when the questions just remain questions and the answer, even though present, isn’t an answer?

What happens when all you see in the void are vestigial fragments of a once delirious vision, floating in the murky waters of a fragmented conscious?

Sometimes … It takes so much more to sit and watch the world go by.

With Due Credits to Bill Watterson and His Magnificent Creation: Calvin and Hobbes

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Blogging

bhowmik — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 10:20:29 +0000

I am inherently a very private person. Talking about what i am thinking or feeling is extremely difficult for me. I believe i am a good listener. I can sit and listen to others for hours in fact i encourage others to talk to me. I love it when somebody can talk to me about whats on their mind, I love it when somebody argues with me about whats on their mind, the insight and passion and the perspective that each person brings to situations which are probably an everyday occurrence fascinates me. But when it come to me doing it …. i always hesitate

As a result i am a hesitant blogger. I find it difficult to write about things which are private and considering my temperament pretty much everything is private

Here is where i make an attempt to try and come out of my shell.

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Buddha Bar

bhowmik — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 06:43:35 +0000

I love my music.

I listen to pretty much anything and everything. In fact i would be hard pressed to classify any kind of music if i was asked to

The Buddha Bar Series has got to be in the top 5 of my all time favourites. The Albums are a compilation of songs by artists from all around the world. And they really are from all around the world. The albums are always 2 CD’s One is usually easy lounge accompaniment for say a Dinner while the other is a more peppy, beat-filled disc with songs more suited to foot tapping or even dancing. The albums are compilations by the resident DJ’s which have been Claude Challe, DJ Ravin, David Visan and Sam Popat.

What holds my attention is the sheer variety of music. I definitely can’t fathom the lyrics for most of the songs as My linguistic abilities are limited to 3 languages at best and maybe understanding a smattering of a few others.

The music is captivating, the variety is great and although i hear a few people saying that the music is getting repetitive i personally don’t think so.

For those of you who want to give it a go here’s a few tracks from the series, (links play in last.fm)

Korana – Sanja Illic & Balkanika [Buddha Bar 8 - Disc 1]
Weather Storm – Craig Armstrong [Buddha Bar 1]
Secret Love – Nicos [Buddha Bar 3]
Solitude – Karunesh [Buddha Bar 3]
Angelic Voices (Rebirth Remix) – B-Tribe [Buddha Bar 6]

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why

bhowmik — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 00:20:00 +0000

One thing that i have noticed is that “why” features a lot in all that i write, it isn’t a conscious thing. I don’t strive to ask that consciously but over the last few months i’ve started to realise that i am obsessed with the why. I’d rather prefer to worry about the “how” consciously but it is the why that torments me all the time consciously and subconsciously, in everything i do.

For most of my posts i try to use a single word heading because i like to keep it simple. the single word heading sort of focuses me on what i am trying to talk about.

Why do i act? Why do i react? why do i go through a certain emotion? what is it that drives that “(re)action” – i need to be able to understand that.

For me it is about why “I” am who i am, what makes me me. It sounds a bit conceited but it isn’t. Its more about a journey towards self awareness, towards Sentience, towards understanding myself.

I find that it gives me more insight into people i meet and interact with. Questioning myself for whatever i do makes me less judgemental about others and their actions.

Sometimes the search for the why is overwhelming because it unearths answers which i may not like or shows me a side of myself which isn’t how i see myself or want to see myself.

But that search is something which is an unchangeable and prominent feature of “how” i think.

Now i just need to figure out “why” i think

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